Delores Melon

I’m learning how to properly operate a handy flash gadget thingy.   While the focus area is small, you get the idea of the flash ability. yay.

that new camera I was lusting after…. the one I mentioned a few posts back… well I got it. Yesterday was mine and Man’s 10 year wedding anniversary.  So my gift was a new camera.  Well it’s a joy, really it’s just what I wanted.  I’ve taken over a hundred shots already, some that are way better than anything I’ve ever taken on my point-and-shoot.

Where are these pictures you ask?  Well they’re still stuck on the memory card.  See, in all my finely detailed research, I overlooked one minor detail.  The new memory cards are too big for my current memory card reader.

Folks, I pride myself on extensive research abilities. I’ve said it before, I don’t fart until I’ve thoroughly researched the pros and cons and best circumstances to gleen the optimum flatulent entertainment.  This is embarrassing to say the least. That one, small detail, has brought my photographic orgasm to a screeching halt.

I could connect the camera directly to the computer, but that’s not how I do it.  *crosses arms and pouts* And it eats my precious battery.

*heads to nearest Geek village for a card reader*

So, yesterday went well.  However, the antibiotic the Dr. gave me for my plague infested tonsils was apparently a “stronger” one that also included a convenient diarrhea side effect. YAY.

Now however, I’m discovering it also causes constant heartburn AND my throat still friggin hurts. It felt ok yesterday, I could eat and drink, but now it’s sore again and I’m taking it as prescribed.  I’ve made the mistake of not taking “as prescribed” and let me tell you, Strep Throat 3.0 is just as bad as Strep Throat 2.0.

I seriously just drank apple cider vinegar. That’s how bad the heartburn is.  I was complaining to Man about the heartburn, again, and he told me to drink vinegar. I said “ew”. He said, “quit complaining then”. He’s super.  So then I googled ‘heartburn remedy’ and read to drink vinegar.. “hmm..” I said… “that might work”.  Yeah, I’m super too. The least offensive one said to mix it with water. I held my nose but it honestly wasn’t horrifying.  Although NOW, I want to vomit. I don’t think my particular stomach is really all that vinegar friendly.

The prescription said not to take an antacid within 2 hours of taking the antibiotic. Well, obviously they know it’s going to cause heartburn. Jerks. And if you aren’t’ supposed to take it within two hours, how do I know the antibiotic will work properly if I take it within 2 hours and 10 minutes? Right?

So now I feel like I want to puke, granted the heartburn feels better, and I’m probably going to poop my pants. Great.

I’m calling them tomorrow to ask for amoxicillan. I’ve never had issue with it and as long as I take it ALL I’m fine. Thank you uber plague fighting pill, but now I want my diarrhea free amoxicillan. And keep your stupid heart furnace.

but I wanted to.  On Sunday night, I got the flu.  The fever, achy, can’t get warm kind of flu.  On Monday I felt a smidge better, and had the brilliant idea to shovel the driveway. We got a good bit of snow overnight and I, being the wonderful wife that I am, wanted to surprise Man with a cleared driveway.  I think I made an error in judgment. By Monday night, I was in bed crying I hurt so bad. My throat felt like I had swallowed a handful of razor blades and I couldn’t get warm at all.  Every joint in my body ached. The thing I remember the most is my tears were so hot they actually felt good on my face.

I spent the entire night waking up every time I turned over, and every time I swallowed. Motrin was not helping… it almost never lets me down, this time it was like I hadn’t even taken it.  I cried Tuesday morning while trying to convey to Man that I was dying. I don’t think he understood. Eventually we managed to communicate to each other that I needed to see a doctor and that I couldn’t manage that myself, so he opted to take the day off from work. He’s almost always this wonderful. Almost.

Somehow I made it to the shower and it felt so warm. I dressed in jeans, a t-shirt, sweatshirt and my warmest socks. I made it to the couch and ended up with two blankets, a fleece blanket, my heavy fuzzy blanket and then, finally an afghan.. and was still freezing.  Every time I had to swallow, I just wanted to cry some more. I wasn’t drinking anything, and not eating. I got a doctors appointment for 11:30 am.

Man had the truck all warmed up and by god if I didn’t have to turn the heat DOWN before we made it to the doctor appointment. I swear I could roast a turkey in his truck.  I also wore “big Bertha”.. I’ll tell you about “her” in a minute.  Needless to say I was actually enjoying the cold air when I got out of the truck.  I was so dizzy and lightheaded.

My temperature was 101.9 and my blood pressure was FINE, thank you very much. Even on deaths door my blood pressure was fine. The nurse did mention how my heart was racing. Probably because I was about to die.  Anyway, God bless her, my doctor came in right away. In fact I was just about to lie down when she walked in. She did the typical “what’s going on” business. She looked in my ears and then got to my throat.  Her response:  “that’s really gross”.

Unfortunately I get this a lot. Like twice a year.  Because of that, she’s now sending me to have my tonsils out. And because she’s uber fun, she said: “Getting them out at your age is much worse; Ten days on your butt minimum”. YAY! I’m so excited. I just love that razor blade feeling in my throat. Her last words to me when we were leaving were “see you for your pre-op visit”. She’s so much fun.

Off we went, to the nearest pharmacy and it was starting to look like Man was losing his wonderful bedside manner. So soon? It was only noon. Luckily he managed the minor issue getting the prescriptions like a champ.  By this time I’d reclined the seat and was trying to doze and not hurt.  I was quite unsuccessful. We made it home and I headed straight to bed. Not before taking one of my antibiotics. My magic pills.  She also gave me a lidocaine gargle.  I was intrigued but once I opened it and attempted to pour it, I almost laughed. It was the consistency of syrup. Or honey. VERY thick.  And it was pretty useless for me. I had ninjas in my throat throwing those sharp little star thingies… like honey was going to do anything to that? Come on.

So I doped up and headed back to bed with a mountain of blankets. As expected I got hot and needed to unwrap. My throat was majorly unhappy still and not showing any signs of letting up.  Two hours after taking my first antibiotic, I took the second.  It said one pill twice a day, it didn’t say how much time between them.  What I failed to learn prior to ingesting these things, was that they cause diarrhea. YAY!

So while I spent the rest of my day in bed, my colon was working up some midnight fun for me. From midnight to 3 am I was up every hour running to the bathroom. How much more exciting can this get?  Worst of all, the antibiotics still hadn’t done a thing for my throat. I was no longer freezing and aching, but my throat was making me want to kill myself, or admit myself to the hospital.  I swear delivering a baby with no medicine was far less excruciating.

I’d had enough by 5 am this morning and took another antibiotic. I’d rather poop myself to death then have to endure another day of this wretched sore throat.  I will leave the “poop myself” pun for another day.  Admittedly from the shoulders down, I felt pretty good.  I stayed in bed for a couple more hours, tossing and turning, until I had to get up to get Man off to work. I got through the ironing without much issue. I piddled about, and headed to the recliner every now and then.  The kids had a two hour delay for school which was helpful as I could move at a much slower pace.  I swear it’s so nice having kids who are now old enough to pretty much fend for themselves. They can dress themselves, etc. Really frees up a lot of my time. hahah

After a little while though, my legs started feeling like jello and I was pretty much done for the morning. The kids headed off to school and I got comfortable in the recliner with a pile of blankets just in case.  I forced myself to drink some gatorade and managed two bites of oatmeal. I was a wild woman.

By noon it was definitely nap time and I took my second antibiotic.  I set the alarm so I wouldn’t forget my children and tried to take a nap. As the law of marriage is written, Man called about a half hour into my nap. I figured if I didn’t take the phone with me, he’d think I’d died and drive all the way home to check. Or worse, he’d call an ambulance. Granted my throat still hurt enough that wasn’t such an awful idea.  Finally by 2pm I’d had enough of the tossing and turning and just decided to get up. My head was starting to really hurt and it was either thanks to the severe lack of food and fluids or the lack of caffeine. Or both.

I noticed something… swallowing didn’t make me want to poke my own eyes out. Could it be… could I really be getting better???

Since I’ve bored you enough as it is… Now, at 8:45 pm, I’m definitely feeling MUCH better. I can swallow freely and without grimacing. My neck is still swollen and very sore, on the outside. It’s still painful to turn my neck and I did manage to get rid of the horrid headache.  Granted my throat is far from “normal” but after the past two days… I’ll take it.  I have many more days left of this wonderful antibiotic to take and as long as I don’t poop myself to death, I’ll be up to snuff in no time.

**Big Bertha is this humongous coat Man got when he was 10. I’ve never seen anything so warm in my life. Apparently Man was an overstuffed kid. Anyway, this coat fits me just fine and I love it. It’s blah blah boring olive drab and has itchy wool lining and is too warm to wear most days but if it’s 20 below, I’m warm and toasty in my “big Bertha”.